Enter The Lawyers

My husband and I have talked many times about hiring an attorney. Before we ever got married, we had discussed what it would take to hire one. Still, money isn't the most readily available resource in our lives which has kept us from hiring one sooner. We wanted to hire one back in early 2013 when we handed my stepdaughter's mom a check to get her an eye exam and glasses, but instead she showed up with Kwik-Stop spectacles on her face that were only causing more damage to her eyes. We discussed hiring a lawyer each and every time our seven-year-old girl showed up in a soiled DIAPER over the past eleven months.  We also discussed hiring a lawyer in August when we were informed babygirl had missed her first week, and several more days of school since there is a history of her bio-mom not sending the kids to school. Money kept us from doing what we knew was necessary. We had to sit back and watch as my stepdaughter was dragged from an abusive home in Florida to an abusive household in Wisconsin to the battered women's shelter to the one bedroom apartment in Lake Geneva and to yet another man's house. All these homes in only a year and a half. I asked myself constantly, "What can I do to make this stop," but I felt being patient with my stepdaughter and being consistent in her life as a healthy role model was all I could do at the time. I considered contacting DCFS many times, and I kick myself everyday for not following through. I was just so scared that I may lose the privilege of seeing her that I hesitated. I knew that there was no court appointed visitation rights, which meant that the minute my husband or I stirred the pot, we would be banned from seeing his daughter. I have lived in fear the last eleven months that if we make one wrong move, her mother would take away any time with her dad and me, and there were many times she threatened it.

We have been lucky thus far, being able to see my stepdaguther every other weekend since December. Plus, in the summer my husband and her mother planned to let her stay for the summer, and although it ended up taking longer for babygirl (and her mom) to adjust, we were able to have her every other week instead.

Now though, my biggest fear has become a reality; my husband was told he is not allowed to see his daughter.Tuesday morning my husband and I called his daughter's school because we were concerned about her attendance and have noticed that she has been wetting herself frequently. Yesterday, Wednesday, her mother sent my husband a text threatening that she would have three attorneys contacting him and that we had better be prepared. Now, though, we are in a better place financially, and what she did not know is that before we called the school we had already contacted a lawyer. We made the decision when I received a call from my lovely little girl Monday night and she said neither she, nor any of her siblings, had gone to school and they would not be going the following day. Enough was enough. My stepdaughter is a smart, bright, enthusiastic child and her education and health are not to be taken lightly. When her mom heard her tell me about her absences over the phone I heard her mother stumbling over her words in the background, "They don't care about that, don't tell them that... that gets us in trouble..." and then the phone hung up. I called back just to let my stepdaughter know I love her, and I hope she goes back to school soon. I could hear her mom coaching her to tell me how the phone had "died." My heart broke, yet again. My husband and I called DCFS that night as well, but it was late and there was nobody available to take our report, so we called the school the following morning. I do not know what they told my stepdaughter's bio-mom. Did she get in trouble for the absences, or did they simply inform her of the conversation we had with them?

Now, we wait. I try not to think about how long it may be before we get see our sweet girl again, because it only hurts. I know though, that when it is all said and done, we will be in a better position. My husband will have his rights, and nobody will be able to take those away. Someday, my stepdaughter will know that we only care about her and her well-being. Eventually, she will understand that we are not out to "bash" her mom, we are looking out for HER best interest. No matter what lies I can only imagine her mother is telling her about us now...