A Simple Trip to the Dentist

I watched the fear in my stepdaughter’s eyes yesterday afternoon as the dentist chair leaned back suddenly and quickly. She had no idea what an emergency root canal was or why she needed it, and an overwhelming feeling of anger rose inside of me: "I have to watch this eight year old child frightened and in pain because of her mother's negligence?"

When the tooth pain became apparent last weekend, my stepdaughter told me it was her wisdom teeth coming in at the ripe age of eight; her mother had informed her of this. When she opened her mouth wide to show me, though, I saw the rotting tooth in the back. Could her mother really be that uncaring? Maybe she is just lazy enough to ignore her child's pain. Nevertheless, I scheduled her dentist appointment for the earliest date that also happened to fall on one of her dad's placement days. I was not expecting my stepdaughter to keel over in pain in the dentist chair after they took the x-ray, and luckily, the dentist came in as she squirmed in discomfort. There was no beating around the bush, she needed a root canal because the baby tooth was not ready to come out, and they started right away.

It was mortifying watching this young child prepare herself for something I, myself, did not experience until I was in my twenties. It did not seem fair as she looked to me for explanation and comfort, her eyes wide with panic. She was brave, though, and I could not have been more proud of her level of obedience as the dentist told her to "open wide" and "bite down." I choked back tears of anger and guilt. Why should I feel guilty, though? Over the last two years, her dad and I have preached the importance of brushing and flossing, and we have done everything in our power to try to reverse the damage from her mother never having her daughter brush. When my stepdaughter was six years old, she did not know how to hold a toothbrush, and she made it very clear that she did not have one of her own at her mother's house. Now here we are, with a dentist bill, upcoming appointments for cleanings and fillings for the rest of those cavities she has, and the dentist said one of the other molars fell out prematurely, most likely due to a cavity that rotted the tooth. 

I feel angry for having been forced to watch my baby go through this because her mother never had her pick up a toothbrush. I feel concern for her siblings who will not have an advocate fighting for them the way I fight for my stepdaughter. I feel guilt for not scheduling an appointment for a checkup weeks ago. Now though, I will continue to do everything in my power to make sure my stepdaughter has a healthy mouth, and a healthy life overall.