It's been a long road. It was five months before we were able to see my stepdaughter, but in February, a temporary custody order was put in place. It opened up a door to a new world, and mediation seems to finally be coming to an end. My stepdaughter has grown to love and trust her father again, and their relationship has bloomed. Sometimes, they are so much a like that it is scary, and I see the way she admires her father. She wants to be like him.
I am proud of my husband for showing her what a devoted daddy looks like, and she is going to have something that many children grow up without: the presence of a loving dad. I know how beneficial this is for both of them. Still, I am having a hard time accepting that as she grows closer to her father, I am pushed to the wayside. On several occasions, this little girl that stole my heart, has made me very aware of the competition she perceives for her father's affection. I am very aware of how normal this behavior is, but being knowledgeable does not necessarily make it hurt less. Now, I get dirty looks, eye rolls, and snide remarks, and it feels like my husband turns a blind eye. Maybe I am not supposed to feel this way, but it can be heart-wrenching to have her close to me, and yet distant.
